Mandatory Milf -> anything you'd want to see there?
Alojz on 10/19/2020 4:57:05 AM
Episode last modified by Alojz on 10/19/2020 4:57:05 AM
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I’m really loving everything you’ve done so far—you’re hitting all the beats I had in mind with the starting episode, and then some. Whichever direction you end up going will probably be as good as your past posts, so I wouldn’t worry too much about alienating the audience. I’m honestly considering adding an episode myself, if it’s alright.
I think its going great right now and don’t worry too much about personal wish fulfillment. The only thing I want to see is long term development. Maybe karyn finds out and Jon tells her he was cursed and they “work” on fixing it while Jon slips more into the role.
Also just a note: I noticed you've given the new MILF two names. Jon refers to get as Auntie Sue but then her new memories refer to get as Laura.
What's interesting is that Jon's sexual and romantic fantasies are very typical for the kind of woman she's become (non-con, having a tall dominant partner, feminization, the fantasy of being a domestic goddess). It'd be neat to see Jon/Laura meet with other MILFs, only to realize she was already more like them than she thought, even before her transformation!
First off, I think those personal fantasies probably coincide with a lot of other people that read this site, so I wouldn't worry about it too much. As far as ideas go, a few things that would be neat to see - Jon continues with the tweaks, but realizes shortly after meeting David that he is in over his head, despite being so firmly stuck. - being trapped is still a turn on, but it's awfully inconvenient when you're y'know, trapped The method of changing Jon could cross over into David's hands. Though I think Jon probably needs to go on a bit longer 'enjoying' himself before he really realizes the consequences of his actions
@aashen good point about the name inconsistency! I'll modify the episodes to fix that.
You didn't aske me, but I would like to add that what I really like is your writing style, especially the fact that you play with Jons perversion of somehow being stucked, but wanting to feel that it is all his fault. You transmit the feeling that he knoews that it could be only a fantasy and a perversion which could go "away" (at least momentarly) if he masturbated, but instead he insisted trying to life his fantasy life. Fantasy which includes AP; Big Boobs, Sumbimissiveness and being stuck in the life of a mature woman. I really hope that you will get some time to progress further, with more branches and more perversions, like one where he wants to try out lovers, affairs (with virgin boys would be the top), or some more non classical jobs like pornstar.
I did assume, in hindsight I shouldn't have done that and I apologize. As far as what I enjoyed, and I kinda suspect I now know why, this writing doesn't fit the bill for r/menwritingwomen. It's descriptive in a way that lets you feel and understand what the character is going through. Also, the premise it starts with is much more realistic than many of the other paths you see on Fiction Branches in terms of what someone here might actually do with a magic rock. John has his fantasy, he knows what he wants to experience. However he's also letting his hormones take control and doing things that, while he is enjoying them now, deep down he knows he's really throwing himself for a loop. I can't wait to see the consequences come crashing down. I'm also enjoying the misinterpretations along the way. Shrugging off the 'little' mistakes that will turn into life changing consequences without really thinking it all through is great.
@aashen don't worry, it was mostly a joke - you assumed correctly and I am a man. I just spent quite a lot of time thinking about what those things would *really* feel like! BTW which "misinterpretations" do you mean?
I mean things like the wish to be shorter going so far as to make him 5'1", kinda getting off on the thought of dealing with it, without actually dealing with the reality of it yet. The potential for things to go farther than he originally intended are super prevalent in the latest wish, as well as in wishes about his husband. What he means to ask for and what he gets are likely to be different things.
> What he means to ask for and what he gets are likely to be different things. Yup, totally. Or he knows that he's asking for something kinda shit (being the masochist he is) but doesn't realise just how bad it'll be to actually live with it. I'm struggling a bit to come up with ways to prevent him making clarifying wishes fixing things without removing the way of wishing from him altogether.
I think there's plenty of room to write still before that even becomes an issue. And I feel like the best way to handle that is in some form of the compulsions he's already under - the inability to show frustration, swear, etc. in front of others. Can't complain about the way he's being treated while he's with someone, and may quickly run out of time alone being a mother / housewife / what have you. And I would certainly consider wishing away someone's behavior to be a form of complaining about it.