Lost and Found in Translation

Author's note: It's been a long time since I had any Spanish, and online dictionaries helped, but there were still problems. Maybe some of the sentences I had problems with were idioms? ---- We finally arrived at the shopping mall. In fact I felt rather strange, but I thought that it felt okay... How can I say it? Like this feminine body of mine were only an exciting experiment. Suddenly, something odd happened. Karyn and I came into a shop. Karyn began to talk to me: "Come on, Joan, see that..." I couldn't hear it. I felt an inner shake. **"What? I don't understand."** Karyn looked at me strangely. "What? What's happening? Why are you speaking in Spanish?" I tried to make an effort to understand. I thought in Spanish, talked in Spanish. Just a moment ago I was talking and thinking in English. What was happening to me? "Say, Joan..." **"What? I don't understand you! I don't understand anything you're saying to me! Holy God!"** "Right! You're joking, surely..." I looked around myself, thinking. I practically didn't understand the language that was around me, but I knew that a moment ago it was my language. I only knew how to think and speak in Spanish. Someone had used the wishing stone, my stone. I took Karyn's arm and told her: **"Karyn, I have to return home, do you understand? R-E-T-U-R-N! It's the stone, you know?"** I made a gesture with my closed fist. **"Someone is playing with me."** Karyn couldn't understand. "Wait a minute... How is that possible? Oh, well, this is... I don''t speak Spanish! Shit! I only can say things like 'Buenoss diass senorita' or... Wait! I'm coming with you, Joan!" I smiled unconsciously, despite being worried, as we left the store. It felt as strange to me as an extraterrestrial in a disco. Yesterday I was a boy and I could understand everything. Today I'm a girl dressed in a dress and boots and I don't understand anything, or almost anything, of the words I can hear around me. I arrived home, walking a bit, running a bit, with Karyn stepping in the heels of my boots for me \[?\]. They could be sexy, but they were uncomfortable for running. We went in. **"Hello! Is anyone home?"** Then Peppie, my worst friend, appeared. With friends like him, of course, I don't need enemies. He looked me up and down arrogantly and told me: **"Hi, Jon. Or can I call you Joan? What pretty makeup you have... what does it feel like being a girl? Or a cultural minority?"** **"Do you know what you did?"** **"Oh, yeah... someone at school told me about the stone, before I let myself into your house. Your mother had gone, she left me waiting for you, how kind... I took the stone, I wanted to know what you were doing and where you were. I already see you're not wasting time without wanting something \[?\]. And good, I decided to amuse myself at your expense. Does it bother you? Ah, what a beautiful language, Spanish. I don't need classes any more. "** I stared at him and I approached him, panting. **"You've had a good joke, son of a prostitute! Give me my stone!"** I hadn't always had it with me. \[?\] This was bad \[?\]. Was it gone? Could I return to understanding my mother tongue?