The New Otherworldly Menace Plans to Turn Jon Into a Sex-Crazed Pervert

Well, of _course_ Jon was against something like that. After all, he wasn't some kind of pervert. At least not _yet_. Because unknown to him, the new otherworldly menace was not only planning to target Santa Claus but also Jon himself, since he held the incredibly powerful wishing stone. Turning Jon into a sex-crazed pervert would be an incredible help to their cause. Out of his own free will, he would help them with their plans to change the world. But first, they (whoever "they" were) had to get to him.